tinker-belle

I wish I was an anonymous mermaid and you were a sailor who knew how to swim. You would never catch me in a net or touch my mermaid fin. You would observe me in the waves with a school of angelfish and I'd weave coral in your hair and tell the jellies not to sting. Floating on our backs exchanging useless facts about the land and sea while the waves incessantly kiss the shore the way that you kiss me.

There you are Awkwardly Wrinkled Shirt Selfishly Looking Down At your shoes Wondering Why my face makes you stare And what I'm wearing Under there Between your ears Empty space While your heart Starts to race Suddenly I don't care If you feel If you're real Robot eyes No surprise Overjoyed Wave goodbye

I am in transit. This airplane is flying over the flatest place I can think of. I have visited my future. It is basically basic and flat. Miles to walk in any direction. Level playing field. An opportune time to run on a narrow path of concrete to the nearest library or rest stop. whichever comes first. I secretly tell this airplane window, in all generosity, that I want to move upward from where my feet usually live on the same familiar ground. I want to climb uphill both ways with you, my friend. Running into this endlessly ending cultivation of civilization is a good way to get somewhere that looks exactly like the bullet proof fantas

I can't feel what I touch. because my pores are clogged with gasoline that you never help me pay for. and my stomach will never be empty again because I have yet to digest the breakfast I was eating when I realized you left me alone months ago. because this cupcake we made? is now toxic. I smell neglect like smoke from a house burning down (you always leave the oven on). My eyes start burning and the mud in my eyes is swimming in that lonely river we never meant to sail away on. I can let go of anything. us quitters? we never stay put. but I will always come back for you. If only you could get one foot out the door and into some sunlight. I k

Does it take 20 minutes to kill yourself? or 20 minutes not to? GIVE ME THE WORLD! or give me a hard slap in the right direction and I will tell you how many minutes it takes to resent them both. I will only be content when you love me enough to make the stars glow pink and spell out my name.  That way, the next time a sailor looks to the heavens to find his way home he will see me. Girl wonder. who searched the stars and was led right back to herself. and today I am cought in a spider web. and by spider web, I mean comfortable bed and by caught, I mean unable to think of a single reason to move. There is a pain from rising

I don't miss you like the desert misses rain. I miss you like umbrellas miss the sunshine they've dreamed about.   it rains you shine I am sopping wet.

I dug through the pockets of past midnights and found out that those expectant stars are diamonds waiting to encircle our necks to draw attention UPWARD, to shine on our cracking porcelain faces and illuminate the beauty of our collar bones. I combed through the tangled hair of past arguments and found out that lice know our heads better than we do and that brown tresses curl best in a warm rain like white toes in the midst of a kiss I raced through the streets of past laughter and found out that our jokes have rescued us from fatal accidents we couldn't see coming and drove us home when we were too scared to drink and instead got drunk off

My fear of being alone probably means I will settle for anything. But this dancer likes her songs long and hard and fast. Not some sallow drunken boy crooning come-ons to the tune of his own heartstrings. She wants a symphony, man. because the radio never broke a sweat trying to keep up. the radio never stopped trying to sell me something the radio never heard what I'm made off Beethoven was deaf and he heard me coming a century away He made those violins produce wings and as long as they are under my feet that stage is mine as far as the audience knows, I live there that theater is the house you grew up in, that stage is your